So last night I had a dream. Not just any dream, but the kind that makes you realize things, the kind that keeps me fighting.

And here is how it goes, or as much as I can remember of it:

----------------

I was on my computer, on gaiaonline, where I was browsing one of my several GSA guilds, listening to people's worries and lending a hand where I could. I was in the middle of a post when I needed to do something, so I left the computer with the intent to finish it. I was going to help a person who's life was miserable, and I wanted to make it better as much as I could. So I left.

And I got back.

My mother was on the computer. She wrote, 'you are a disgusting piece of garbage', and had posted it. And I sat there and watched her do it. I had the opportunity to stop her, and I didn't. And after she did, I yelled at her.

I am a hypocrite.

I didn't stop it, I didn't do anything to even delay it. Only afterward did I yell at her.

We argued, she using stupid things, so I almost broke my door down on the way outside. I ran past a tree and into another place that I hid earlier, in another dream, sulking.

My friends found me. They had no idea what was going on, so they showed my mother right where I was. We had another screaming battle.

I got angry.

We have something at our house that looks like a large umbrella. I threw it up into a tree, where she put two other things.

They fell.

The screaming match turned into 'ick up those fucking things and put them back!'

And it ended.

-------------------------

For such a short dream, it held for me an important message. I had walked up to the chain holding one of the objects in the tree, and that's when I came upon a sudden realization:

If I don't pull this back up, nobody will.

If it's not pulled up, it will sit here, all the way below where it should be, and rot.

Eventually, nothing will be left of it.


Even though it might only happen in a few hundred years, I could have done something about it.

-----

Now, imagine if that wasn't merely an object, but a cause? What if that cause was something I believed in, something I would now fight for even if I died because of it?

I will not relive this dream. Instead, I will do whatever it takes to keep my mother from posting that awful message. I will break the computer, I will slap her, push her, anything.

But I will not stand for her shit anymore.

I will not stand for ANYBODY'S shit anymore.